Almost no writing the last month, simple as that. The reason is simple; writer’s block. I wasn’t happy with the ending I had in my head so that just kept me from writing; I think I have solved that problem now so I hope things will speed up soon. The old ending I had in mind was just too anti-climactic and not “Hollywood” enough, not that the new ending will be full out Hollywood it will just be less boring.

Confidence hasn’t been that high lately anyway due to various factors, I just feel stuck in my current life and don’t know what to do about it besides finishing the movie script. Though that’s everything but a secure future plan, it’s a long shot at best. In the end it’s just a side project where I’ll see what comes from it.

Doesn’t mean I haven’t done anything in general, I redesigned the other websites after all. The visitor numbers still aren’t as high as I want them to be, though I still hope that will change in time. It’s not like starletviews.com is the only celebrity blog out there. I’ll just see what the future holds, the site looks a bit better now so every little thing might help.

Very short this time but there’s not that much to tell.

I haven’t written anything on here and I haven’t written much as far as the script goes either. The combination of being busy with other things and having a irregular work schedule can do that. On top of that I’ve had a really bad cold for two weeks, I know that a cold isn’t anything major but I just can’t focus on a story when I my head is full of snot. And when I mean full of snot I mean full of snot, everything fills up in my head, to such an extent that I get tooth aches.

I also made a major mistake, I set myself a deadline. Sometimes you just can’t predict if you’ll get busy with other things so there was no way of knowing whether I could finish the script in June. Turns out it won’t be done in June. I’ll be a couple of days off next week though so I’m hoping I’ll be able to get some writing done then. Another thing that might be holding me back is some doubt I have about the ending. Most scripts have happy endings, it’s just the way it Is. I’m now torn between two endings, one bad and the other one very dark and bad. The second option might even be too dark, I don’t know. I’ll decide when I get to it. Which hopefully will be soon.

I’ve at least managed to get the posts up on starletviews.com and the site has been getting record numbers of visitors. Still not that many but it’s slowly growing though sadly mainly due to weird image searches on google. Maybe that will change in time, something that needs to change I think though is the look of the site. It doesn’t look bad but it just looks a bit too plain with the color scheme.

I’m still grateful to allisonp1 for doing this graphic design and I will keep using it for starletlinks.com. There isn’t that much sense in keeping them graphically matched right now so I might as well change it a little bit. This time I’ll try to do a new graphic look myself, to make it easier I bought a Wacom graphical tablet. They’re not cheap but they’re good and they make work in graphical programs a hell of a lot easier. Note that I use Paint.NET and not Photoshop, I simply don’t have the money to pay Adobe prices and my computer is completely illegal software free and I want to keep it that way. To practice I did the header for this site, I couldn’t think of a more basic way to do it but sometimes less is more.

I don’t know when the new design will be up and if I’ll put it up, I need to ask for some opinions before I do that. I don’t see myself as the most talented in computer graphics so we’ll have to see. I’m also very self critical so even though something might look good I might hate it because I think my work sucks. I’m also not sure whether I should even include pictures in a new header, a site might work better if there’s just a uniform look to it without a lot of graphics. I guess I’ll just keep toying with the graphics for a bit.

I have input all the things I wrote while I was away into Final Draft, sadly it’s less than I hoped for. Only got to 72 pages where I expected 80. On second thought it isn’t that bad a thing though, the story is going where I want it to be going and it means I don’t have to rush through the last part of it.

I’m proofreading what I’ve written so far; I was amazed at how many times I used the word just. It was really annoying so I removed it in most places, no idea why I was using it that much.

I’m actually working this weekend so the proofreading is done on my way to work on the train. It just sucks that those trains are in the middle of the night, I really prefer late shifts over early shifts. But they have their advantages as well. Even though I’m off on Monday I don’t know if I will get to a lot of writing.

Not that I don’t know what to write but I also have other things to take care of, starletviews.com just being one of them. Trying to increase the number of posts on that site, it just sucks that people only seem to be attracted to either trash sites and sites with pictures. When you actually want to write something positive or not simply mean but critical people won’t visit it. As for the images, I just don’t want to get into trouble with image agencies. I have tons of pictures the problem just is that I don’t know the original source. Though I only use pictures for editorial use so there some once in a while.

As for starletlinks.com, I’m actually increasing the number of people featured on the site. It’s up to 58 now while I once vowed I would only do 50, thing just is the more names the more visitors so I don’t really have a limit right now. The fact that I set certain rules as for who is featured means it won’t grow too big anyway. I always remove names as well anyway seeing the site is focused on the under 25 year olds. Might seem like an odd limit but I just find it interesting to see how young actresses develop.

I also should edit the look of this blog really, the standard layout is annoying the hell out of me. A different banner would already make a huge difference so I might do that tonight seeing I’m not really motivated to write after an early shift and a bad ride home.

Seeing that I run a site on younger celebrities I often get the question who I would like to see fill some of the parts. Yes there is one big role in the movie that would be for a younger actress but I don’t write for actresses. If THEVO was ever to be made (which pretty much never happens to spec scripts) I wouldn’t say that a specific actress would be perfect for a role. A role should be a character and not an actress, just like an actress would have to become her character in a movie.

That’s enough for today though, still hoping I will get some writing in this week. I’ll try and keep the one scene a day thing in mind if my schedule allows it.

Back home again and I actually achieved quite a bit of what I wanted to get done. First of I finished the book The Script-Selling Game, though it’s far too early for me to read books like that it’s still helpful in certain aspects. Not that I’m going to use everything out of it but I’ll sure take certain pointers. At a later stage I would probably use more from it.

It actually made me consider going to writers conferences at some point. Of course that would be quite a large expense but it might be useful at some point. So I’d better start saving up for that, though I wouldn’t actually attend one until I had a completed script and outlines on several others at the least. Otherwise it wouldn’t really be worth it.

In the last couple of days I actually managed to get 25 written pages of the THEVO script. Though that’s hand written pages, typed up in Final Draft it should be anywhere between 30 and 50 pages. So that’s real progress, not saying that all of it will end up in the final script of course. But it’s finally some real writing in over a month. Inputting it into the computer will take some time as well, not sure if I’ll be doing that today or tomorrow. I want it done before Wednesday though, going back to work then. Not looking forward to that but paying the bills is still a necessary evil.

I actually added some extra scenes that I didn’t plan on in the script at first, main reason for that being that it just needed something extra at some points. Though you shouldn’t put too much information into a script not enough isn’t a good thing either.

My copy of Script Magazine still isn’t here, guess I have to send them an email yet again. This is getting annoying, I don’t doubt them sending it so this isn’t just annoying to me but to them as well. Not that I can’t continue writing without the magazine but I still paid for it so I still want it.

Though THEVO is the only script I worked on while I was away, though I’m always thinking about other ones I didn’t actually write anything down for the other ones. THEVO is the most important one, I’ve set many deadlines for it and those only work against me. So it will be done when it’s done, I’m not mentioning any dates. Though it’s quite far done now.

I didn’t want to work on it fulltime either of course, one of the other points of taking time off from work is to simply relax. That’s important once in a while too.

On my third day of being off from work now and I haven’t really done that much writing yet. I did do a lay-out of what scenes more or less still have to be written so it at least is a start. And to be completely honest I haven’t really been in the mood for writing the last couple of days.

I just can’t sit down and write I have to be in a certain mood. Which in a way sucks, would go a lot faster if I could get myself into that mood on command. There probably are some techniques of doing that I just have to find it. The fact that I’m still waking up at 6am every morning doesn’t help either, I figured that might end once I was off from work but not yet. Still thinking that’s just a phase though.

Next week I actually hope to get quite a lot done on my script. Why? Because I won’t have access to my computer; I will be looking after my mother’s dog at her house while she and my sister go to visit my grandmother. Seeing I don’t have a laptop I will just have to manage without a computer. Though that would increase the chances of me getting some writing done by simply putting it on paper. It might be an old fashioned method of script writing but it works for me. Though I still have to put it into the computer afterwards and in that process I always make some changes.

I also finished the Making a Good Script Great book by Linda Seger, again just like with all the script writing books I’ve read there are very useful things in there. I’m not saying I will use everything from it but certainly some aspects, as all the books say everyone has to find their own style and writing process. Right now I’m reading The Script-Selling Game by Kathie Fong Yoneda which I more or less ordered by accident (seeing I’m not trying to sell any scripts yet) it still contains useful hints. What sucks though is that I think that once again my Script Magazine didn’t arrive, would be the second time. The mail sure is screwing up lately, didn’t get another magazine subscription either this month.

That I won’t be at my computer will also mean that my sites won’t be updated for a bit though I doubt hardly anyone will notice, they’re not exactly high traffic sites. Which still sucks but I’m still not planning on giving up. I’m still hoping that my less shallow voice will be heard at some point though it’s sometimes hard to come up with good stuff to write about.

Also started the gym thing this week, still a bit sore from working out two days in a row but not too bad. Also figured I could get some (script) thinking done while doing that but with the crappy music selection at the gym that’s not happening. I take my own mp3 player there but it’s not enough to filter out the crappy workout music. Also on a bit of health food trip the last couple of days, eating a lot of fruit and fruit smoothy’s. Not eating just fruit though, I know someone who fucked up her stomach with that once.

Just hoping that it all be worthwhile and that I start to lose weight again. Well and that I might get more inspired to start writing somehow, it’s also a confidence thing I guess.

Not really that much been happening script wise, a lot of conceptual thinking of course. Just not that much chance to get a lot of writing in, though I did edit large portions of what I’ve got so far. To improve continuity and other things, I would say it’s about 1/3 of the rewrite done on paper now. Having the story in your head is one thing, getting it onto the paper is something else.

I just have three more days of work (Today (in date anyway), Tuesday and Wednesday) and then I’ll be off for two weeks. I hope to get a lot of writing in at that point. Though I have to spend five of those days dogsitting, so I’ll be away from my computer. I’ll take pen and paper with me though, so that won’t be a problem. Though I simply need some time off, I can’t say that I have a really stressful job or private life but I’m putting pressure on myself. So that’s not really a good thing, haven’t been sleeping too well either. So some time off will do me good, I just feel a bit mentally tired.

Also going to join a gym next week (physical therapist orders, it’s down the street so proximity won’t be an issue), to strengthen my shoulder muscles. Though it won’t hurt to lose some more weight, that has been a bit at a standstill. My lost weight is pretty much stuck at 34kg/75lbs now (yes I am overweight, I’m not denying it), so I’m going to try and step that up a bit again. Guess I’ll also use those two weeks off to do a proper house cleaning, almost think I might need more time than two weeks if I do all of those things. We’ll see how I get on.

This week was a good week as for as posts for starletviews.com go, a lot of things happening (though some blown out of proportion a bit). I hope it stays that way, though hopefully with some more sane news. Though there won’t be any posts when I’m dogsitting of course. It just sucks that I keep trying to email the people at TVGuide and they simply do not respond, if they don’t respond quickly I’m going to yank their links from starletlinks.com soon.

I’m not exactly looking forward to this weekend, it’s my mother’s birthday this weekend so the whole family is coming over. I can already hear my uncle bitching about how I’m throwing my future away with the job I’m doing now. That I should be doing something else, finding a new school, etc. Still not going to tell him that I’m busy writing a movie script, he would call me insane.

Though in some regards it is a bit insane, though insanity would suggest I don’t know what I’m doing. Seeing I do know that there’s only a very remote chance that my script writing plans will succeed would show that I’m not insane. It just shows that I’m trying to do something that’s close to impossible, especially looking at where I come from. I just made the choice not to do something because it wouldn’t succeed too often. This time I’m going to stick with it, doesn’t matter how remote the chances are.

It doesn’t mean that I won’t go back to school though, I just haven’t found anything I really like. Once you failed at something you thought you would love it isn’t exactly easy finding something you will love and you succeed at. Getting into filmschool is close to impossible here though, there aren’t enough places available and if you go the private way it’s too expensive. Logistically it’s not really a practical thing either. So I’m doing it on my own, reading literature on the subject helps of course.

That’s enough for now, the next time I hope to have done a lot more.

For people who think I’ve given up on posting here (yes I’m fully aware that pretty much no one visits this site) but no, I’ve just been too busy really or I just couldn’t be bothered at times. I haven’t been able to do that much writing on my script for a large period of that time, partially personal reasons and also a lot of work. Other times I was just too tired or not inspired to write.

But that has to change, I want to get this thing done at some point. I’m fully aware of the fact that I’m also scared of finishing it, afraid that when I send it in to a competition it will fail. There’s not really a need for that though, the script this script is based on pretty much sucked as far as writing methods go. It was all dialogue, nothing else and it still got a decent review from the competition. So this one can only be better, not that it would win but it would be a hell of a lot better than the first one. Though seeing it’s a scifi script I still need to build in some more futuristic descriptions.

I’m also keeping budget concerns into mind now, when I started rewriting I just wrote everything that looked great in there. But if you enter a competition with a movie that would cost a hundred million dollars to make you stand no chance at all really. So I’m keeping it futuristic but not too extreme, I’m not writing any real action scenes into it anyway.

I have changed the method of my writing this past week and it’s showing progress. Instead of staring at my computer screen not knowing what to write I first write everything by hand. Usually when I’m not at home. Every time I go to work I have a 45 minute train ride, when it’s quiet on the train I just write. Or when I’m at my mother’s place (who doesn’t have a computer) I also just write, works a lot better than having a computer with all sorts of distractions connected to it.

There was also a period where I simply couldn’t write because I had personal things to take care of, in that time I did read other scripts though. So instead of writing I was learning from other people, just a wide array of scripts really, not one specific genre. This thing might be a sci-fi movie but it doesn’t mean that’s all I’ll do.

I’ve actually had more ideas for scripts in the meantime, I added what is codenamed Save the World to my projects in development. I won’t say what it’s about, I can just say that it’s extremely weird. I got the idea while just being silly with one of my internet contacts over a prolonged period of time. Who knows it might just be silly enough to work.

I’ve also ordered another script writing book to read (it never hurts to read more on the subject, as long as they’re quality books) but Amazon doesn’t have it in stock right now so I’m still waiting for that. I’m still reading Script Magazine of course, though of the three issues I received so far the first one was the most useful. The other two were not as helpful, that was also due to a couple of movies being discussed I’m not too fond of. I hope that will be different in the next issues.

On the website front everything is as usual really, I just wish that I would get more visitors. It doesn’t pay to be nice these days, only mean things sell. But I’m not the kind of person to go that way. But that’s enough rambling right now, I’ll see if I can post more progress reports on here. Though there’s not that many progress reports seeing I’m not willing to tell what the movie is even about. You just have to keep some things secret at times.

Two weeks since I last posted and hardly any work done on the script, which sucks I have to admit. I can already say that next week I will hardly get anything done, I’m picking up too many shifts at work right now. I have to learn to say no, but a steady income is also important so that’s always a bit of a dilemma. I’ll probably try and schedule some more free time next month but that’s not as easy either seeing there are several vacancies at work so other people have to pick up the slack.

I’ve been reading movie scripts again, this week it was I Robot, the movie sure turned out completely different than the original script. But it’s also a sci-fi script, that’s why I read it. I’m not just reading scripts in that genre though, I’ve read other types of scripts as well.

Though if I find more time to write in the next couple of weeks it would be easier, it looks like I have solved a couple of my continuity problems. Even though I’m not writing I’m always thinking.

Last week I also came up with another movie concept which puts the counter at five. The counter for finished concepts is zero. I’m just writing them down and putting them aside though, the main focus is still on the current one.

The busy holiday period is over; finally seeing I’m not really that fond of them. Mainly because they start all the holiday junk as early as November; Christmas just shouldn’t start until December 24th.

As far as the websites are concerned I haven’t really spent any time on them at all; starletlinks.com doesn’t need that much attention right now and I simply decided to put starletviews.com on holiday hiatus. Mainly due to a lack of article ideas. Starletforums.com is still dead which isn’t really that surprising but disappointing none the less.

I also hope to get some script work done this week; I’ve had another script idea though so that’s a total of five ideas now. I have to finish the first one though, I really need to hurry on that (well not too much) otherwise it will never get done.

Somehow the script writing isn’t going as good as I hoped, there are several reasons for that. For one I’m just doubting myself too much at times, I have to get over the fact that not everything will work in a first rough draft. That’s the beauty of the computer; the backspace button.

I have the story in my head so I shouldn’t worry about small things, I can change the smaller things at a later time. Yet it’s slowing me down, I hope I’ll get over that problem soon. Ten pages is just a start nothing more, I just need to get the speed of writing up, two or three pages a day just won’t do. I should be doing ten pages a day. So what if half of it is crap, it might turn out better than expected.

I think that in the first ten pages of the rewrite there’s about half the amount of dialogue than in the first writing attempt. So a lot more visual description than talking by the characters. I still think that I need to make a little darker mood wise though.

The thing with Christmas coming next week is that I probably will have less time to write; seeing I’ll be away from my computer. Then again, being away from your computer once in a while is a good thing.

I also came up with another movie idea last week; probably the dumbest movie idea better (I was talking to someone on the internet and we were in a silly mood). The only way it would be possible to make would be animation; I don’t know if I’ll ever write a script for that though. I still have two other projects planned, THEVO is the main priority now though. Though I think that in concept TLEVO would be a better movie but I have a clearer image of THEVO as a complete movie.

I’m more motivated to write now though, mainly because I’m starting to hate my job after doing it for nine months. I’m still only there on temporary bases but I think they might be offering me a fixed position soon. I don’t think I’ll be taking that because it would mean I would have to work more. Even though the pay would far better than right now I would have to give up on my other ambitions and I’m not prepared to do that.

So that’s why I want to get over this “fear” of writing, I mean if THEVO fails to impress anyone I won’t give up but I still fear that people will hate it. Seeing the first attempt I did at writing got a more or less sufficient from a screenwriting competition I shouldn’t be that worried, technically that script sucked I can see that now. So this rewrite should be doing a lot better.

Maybe the writer’s strike is actually giving me more time; though once the strike is over there probably still will be chaos in Hollywood and it will take time until everything is back to normal.